I am here , alive and awake , in the middle of the day . When I'm here alone in the daytime , I don't turn on lights I'm not using , instead opening curtains and relying on memory of place . This conserves some small amount of fossil-fueled energy , and makes use of the free energy provided by God . I don't usually turn on the TV except as background noise , voices in another room so I don't feel quite alone on the difficult days . Today I don't have an agenda that I can remember , and thought some music would be a nice change . I have a tab open for Pandora , set to what it calls my John Prine radio . This plays an eclectic mix of folk , bluegrass , gospel , protest , all sort of " alternative " in some way . My medication has reached the dosage balance where I can listen to sad and emotionally disturbing songs without bursting into tears . I guess I am now chemically " anti-depressed " , it's nice to be able to enjoy music that I love without side effects . Of course , it's a medically induced state of mind and not a " natural " one . Regardless of it's authenticity , it is waaayyyyy better than the alternative , not just to me but to the people around me . I still get tangled in the whirlwind sometimes , but more scattered than concentrated , and less destructive to myself and others . Days like today , with clarity and calm , aren't always available , so I try to let some of my ideas come out . I'm not sure ideas is the right word , nor is thoughts , or musings , so I'll leave it to you to interpret until I remember the word . There is so much going on in here ( my mind ) that I would like to share , if I am capable of doing so . Some of it is just wasted on extraneous verbiage for the sake of enjoying the echos of my own thoughts . Those last 3 or 4 sentences probably contain 20 or 30 words that aren't at all necessary to convey the message . " Alas ! Poor Yorick ! I knew him , Horatio . " Sometimes ridiculously unconnected thoughts and phrases just pop up here and there in my mental narrative , but usually I filter those out . This is one place where I can lay bare my strangest thoughts , at least I hope so . There are days where it would be interesting to be a character in one of Shakespeare's plays , or at least an actor in one .

<img alt=””Militarization” src=””http://blog-cdn.arrestrecords.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Police_Design03.jpg”” width=””800″” /> Militarization of our Police Forces – An infographic by the team at <a href=””http://www.arrestrecords.com””>ArrestRecords.com</a>

   Stuck here in the middle is this link to an infographic about the militarization of our police forces . This should be of concern to all of us , as it is a threat to our most basic freedoms . Starts as a bunch of kids playing cops and robbers , ends up killing and terrorizing innocent citizens . I have a lot of things to say on this subject , but I will save those for another day .

   And now , friends , back to today's soliloquy . Is that spelled right ? Spell check didn't flag it , sometimes I amaze myself with the ability to spell words I haven't used or seen in decades . Of course , I have probably twice the working vocabulary of your average spell checking app . Maybe I've just gotten so far down the page it can't see what I'm doing . Again on the subject of clarity in the midst of the cyclone . I believe God has allowed our wise men , none of whose names will ever be known to us , to quietly work to improve our lives . Chemically , medically , mechanically , and spiritually , man's knowledge is ever increasing , and mostly used for good .  I've reached a point where I must break off . To be continued .